“I’ll take a tall coffee, black.”
The waitress nodded, adept at the job there wasn’t a need to write such a simple order and turned, returning to the kitchen.
“So, but wait. How long have you been married? Why would you be thinking about this after so long? Marilyn is a great woman my brother.”
The man in his clean light grey suit and tie paused to sip his cup that had arrived promptly. “Well, we fight so much now. I don’t even know if she even cares for me anymore. I guess if I had to guess I wouldn’t blame her.”
The other chuckled.
“To much work at the office Frank.”
“Heck, and what does she want me to do about that? I bought this new house, well, buying, and she wants a child so there’s a lot to keep up with. Sometimes. . . I think if I don’t keep pace with the work, I’ll get tripped up somewhere and after that it’ll all be lost.”
“Yeah. It’s rough.” The other man said, too sipping his steaming cup.
“And what about you, you’re single and loving it. You’ve got money and a condo, not even a dog to clean up after. You’re life is grand. Just a kid too.”
“I’m five years younger than you.” He said with a chuckle, almost choking on his drink.
“You’ve got morals man. I remember back when, I wasted a lot of money just on the night life. The females, well, to think of it I guess I didn’t feel like it was wasted.”
“Hey, look I have had females. But that’s not all what I’m about, to be honest, that’s probably your issue man. Forget about how it used to be, there’s nothing to return to. You think about going back to what you used to have and when you return all you have is a headache and knee pain.”
The man let out a loud belting laugh which was probably a little loud for the establishment.
“You might have me there, Jonas. But, dreams are at least dreams. We can at least have those.” The other nodded, but leaned in closer and his expression grew serious.
“Dreams, do you ever think of why we have such dreams? I mean, Frank, would you really be happy to be alone and on the prowl? To have to get a gym membership? Have you seen Instagram lately? These young ones out here are all about fitness, and you’re not about to go snatch one up if you look like you can’t hang.” Frank sat back and looked up to the ceiling and exhaled large.
“No. I’m definitely not about that. I couldn’t tell you why. Maybe it’s because of the fact that as people, when we can’t seem to resolve our current situations, we resort to dreaming up new ones that are only often more or less fairy tale realities. I mean, gym membership? Me?”
The other snickered, his cup up to his nose.
“We do resort to that. Heck, I’ve resorted to thinking about life with a wife and kids too.”
“No, you, really?”
“Gimme’ a break man, what’s wrong with that?”
“Nothing, I just. . .”
“Anyhow, that’s what we do as humans. We see the other side and we think we want that over there, not contemplating the requirements of said life. Everything has it’s draw backs Frank.” The other stared out to the windows and pushed his lips to the side with a grunt.
“This is life for us brother. Coffee, fake smiles, and traffic. ”
“How true that is. I couldn’t even count the fake smiles between my wife and I during a normal day. They’re almost automatic.”
“You’ve got to change that. Not avoid it and leave it for another man to fix, that’s your dilemma. Both of you have to join together in it.”
“I know. I mean I definitely don’t like doing laundry enough to be hittin’ the night life everyday.” The two laughed.
“It might seem like a easy way out when you think about it, but there’s a reward in toughing through what you’ve already got if there’s some genuine good in it instead of looking at what everyone else has. There’s has got to be. But no, not like some pretender who merely does it and goes through the motions, but a real conscious effort. There’s got to be like some core to it you know?”
“Yeah, I mean like you know in the end of it all, that special place deep, deep down inside that only a small fraction, of a fraction of us see in life. Some real meaning to find, that most people don’t find because they’re too busy getting distracted by other things and quit.”
“Ah, I see like something for hanging in there, and not perpetuating a cycle.”
“Yep. But I would say good luck finding many people who could tell you what that’s like, or how to get there. You could probably search the world to find one.” The other paused for a moment, and poured a couple sugar packets in his newly refilled cup of coffee.
“You’re probably right. Honestly, I would say that I don’t know what I’m doing. How would I even be able to tell if I said went into something new, and were even doing things right? I mean, heck, I’ve never done it before how would I tell. I would probably be more uncomfortable in that situation than anything else.”
“This is all too much, this life thing. I mean, it was better when we were kids, what were we thinking? But then again, maybe we’re just over complicating it all.” He said then took a sip of coffee. The other rubbed at his forehead while looking at a desert menu in his left.
“Over complicating it all! That’s for sure. But, that’s what you do when you don’t know what you’re doing in the first place right? I mean, have you ever tried fixing something you had no idea of how to fix? Nine times out of ten you only end up by taking it more apart making it worse than when it started. Where all in some mess of it.” He said with a laugh.
The other tipped the bottom of his mug to the ceiling, then promptly landed it back down to its napkin. “The whole mess, yep, and what a wonderful mess it is. About time to head back huh?”
“Unfortunately. Yep.” His eyes glanced over to the parking lot, thinking of the sun and the heat.